Afta A Long Thoughtful Days....

Hey,

I am back afta a long time to update my bloggy....Anyway let me start my post with my updates of swensens.. I have resign from the job on 28 feb 2010. My very last day. Resignation was due to some mis complication between my managers...as u can see underground stuffs do happen. Couldn't get along. Another reason was...had a So called " LOVE TRAINGLE" in there...i couldn't stand it...2 guys after me i am totally not interested in all this...Man..one of them is married and has a wife in INDIA...he still wants me as his galfwen..dammit Cheap Bugger...Malaysian Guy aftaa me dame not good...not interested...I reallie can't stand this type of think it is so not me. They are like way older than me can't they tink for themselves...haix...complecated life..so i decide it is good to leave the path and start a new path...which is more less complication and leads to a smoother path. am i right to say that.... So i am currently looking for a new job hope to get one very soon.

So after all this Work stuffs...i have some other tink that was bothering me in life...i dnt know i have this feeling running into me that i can't change. I have always tried too as my dad always tell me start a new path in life...but i can't to onli one think in life. Its my love ...i have tried to avoid stuffs and move on and get to begin a total new destiny...but fate is making tinks come back to where it belongs..this didnt happen once or twice its like for 5yrs...of pain and sorrow...how can i change this very path. Even today afta the movie " MY NAME IS KHAN" my dad was talkin bout him...my parents are confident that he would be my life partner...but the ans is NO...he has alreadi forgotten me and he has started a brand new life for himself. He does not have feelings for me anylonger...i am nothing to him anymore juz a old newspaper in the rubbish bin Or shall i say a friend who is needed when he is having prob...i dnt know..i never or dnt noe how to ask him...its weird sometime...i speak to him on the phone telling myself he is my friend nth mre...but when we talk there is alwqys something that make me miss him more and love him more...the EVERY SECOND EVERY MINUTE of Pain Runs Thru Me......I dnt know...it's very painful...You will not believe this...i get jealous wen he talks bout his gal...i am feeling it now onli...i have to avoid all this...i dnt wan to be the culprit who spoils his life...i have to move off... Oh GOsh!!! i can't believe i am getting jealous i have neva got jealous but this is the first time i am...i can't be.. Thats why i can't " TAKE HIM AS MY FRIEND ANY LONGER" there is no place in my heart for him to be my friend...Oh god...!! help me !!! This pain and confusion i am going thru can't be solve unless i dnt talk to him...but i am controlling myself..and i will no prob..i will change my mindset to get thinks right...and i will..!!!

anyway after all this pouring rain of pain...i am gng to have a break now and think of my life...i just need a break for myself...i very goodbreak... i will update u mre..tkcre cya...